Isn’t it? Scratching my head to get a few things sorted out.. my house, my master’s program, my kid going to the big school, and my sanity !! Definitely not hitting the road to anywhere this year end as I’ve done that the past 2 weeks and couple of months ago down under.
A whirlwind of a year which keeps me falling down and getting up over and over again, but I keep on finding ways how to survive such a tough year. I just need to close this year smoothly after getting most of the things needed to be done ticked off. Just pity my poor thesis which have not gotten it’s fair attention.
I have been through my first and only headache in my life — never experienced a headache in my life.. went to the doctor twice and finally to see a specialist. Nerve test done, X ray done. Alhamdulillah all was clear.. the doctor found a few things in the process but wasn’t too serious or threatening. Just that I have to take it easy a bit to relieve the neck spasm which is the devil — causing the severe non-stop throbbing and hurtful pain at the back of my head.
Wish it could just end when it happened. But there I was depending on the medication and not being able to do anything about it except take the medicine. Such a test … And finally.. alhamdulillah I feel sooooooo much better today I am able to take this phone and start blogging again.
Such is life, you pick up yourself up and carry on. Having the right support physically, mentally and emotionally is vital too in any life terrain which comes our way. I would say love and value yourself first and foremost. And when you do, especially when valuing yourself, nothing can keep you down. No distance too far, no waves too high. You either conquer or die trying. I’ve spoken to many people and see how different ‘battles’ are fought.. and each coming battle , we start becoming wiser and wiser.. a better armour, a stronger shield, a sharper weapon, a better perception and a wiser judgement. List goes on. As we go further on fronting more battles, then we start realising those battles are meant to teach us in becoming our own warrior for the battles which we pick to fight. Such is life.. this Instagram famous era have deceived some of us to believe that all is okay, and all have to look 1:1 picture perfect. But behind that facade, all, all is crumbling.
Of course it’s good to have an ideal goal.. but it gotta be a realistic one too. Me being the old skool type still prefer real friendships over coffee than over the wireless. Kids? Same too.. I try to keep them grounded as possible..no phone over dinner and speak with your parents and family cause dinner time is family time. What’s lost somehow and unfortunately in our time, is our human and intimate touch. I was frustrated having to observe and witness the behaviour of a family in the next table yesterday during dinner, who were waiting for their dad to bring food on the table (it was a self-service cafe). Long queue. We were half way having dinner, 1 bowl of pasta each for my kid, and .. when I looked up, all three at the next table were literally hooked on their gadgets.
What heart wrenching was that, one of the 2 sons was a special child.. I’m not sure but seemed like a down syndrome child. Both were on gadgets. Mom? Their mom was busy flicking her gadget too. I think 15 minutes passed, my kids were finishing their meal.. (I just had prawn-egg sandwich), and.. still, no conversation. Not a word uttered, not a word heard.. then finally, their dad came with the food. I don’t see no smile in any of those faces.. just mere passing the meals around the table.. what happened next irritated me to the max even though this family had nothing to do with me, nor do I know any one of them.. all plates set on the table (their table), and this really turned me off.. their mom was propping up her son’s phone against the fully filled glass of water– so that son can continue to watch, eat, and no one speaks. I was like….wwwhhaattttt?????!!
If anything is wrong with me, it will be me making judgement of this family. But the belief that no gadgets not TV shows or games can and never replace familial relationship, kept me thinking if this is the way most of our society choose to go..then be gone to family unity, begone with parenting and begone with children who can grow up in holistic manner who values value (ie regarding family time as sacred) and children who have self-esteem and confidence and who can start a conversation.
Well anyways, that wasn’t just a rant. Only an observation of a mother to another one. My teachers told me the current generation now is different. Studies show the same too. Kids and generation NOW lacks grit, lacks self-esteem.. and depend on external validation to do simply anything. Well, of course not all of them. We, parents need to change the game. We can’t wait for statistics and researchers to tell us how we have failed as parents. Act now, and let’s make our family institution stronger. Get our head straight, and stop confusing our kids with our mixed messages.
I don’t want my kids to grow up not being able to talk to their parents. They need to respect family time the same way they should be able to carry self-respect wherever they go. Oh gosh.. I won’t continue as it will become another topic on its own.. but I hope I have hit the right notes here.. everything comes from home. Formal education? Even those changes from time to time.. that solid and holistic base have to be built from the comforts of our homes.