What’s the cost of an ‘impression’? A note to Gen-Xs.

If you are an observant person, or would like to be more observant on your IG posting reactions (its a reality check), take the number of Likes (in the photos with most likes in your IG), and divide it with the number of followers which you have. Times by 100. That’s the percentage of people who have responded and Liked your post.

Now, look at the other postings. What are the number of Likes your normally get. Same thing.. average it out and divide it by the number of followers which you have, and times it by a 100. There.., that’s a more accurate representation of your posting reactions.

While most of us here (since majority of my FB/IG list are from GenX and Boomers , we would most probably post for the sake of sharing with our friends and family members (depending on who our Followers are) and not for the sake of Likes and popularity. But if we do for the sake of Likes and popularity as that’s the only means we can think to boost our ego and self-esteem, no one will tell us that it’s wrong because 1) ‘wrong’ is a poor choice of word and 2)they have nothing better to do. You’re left with your own judgement. Cloudy

sometimes.

What’s more important is that we ask ourselves , if all the time , effort (and other form of resources depending what we have..), is actually really worth it.

This whole pretentious and pompous act has reached to another level. It has, unfortunately, become a norm– I just watched the latest Jumanji movie, and there was this scene where one of the characters (Bethany) was spending a bit of time and effort to look ‘effortless’ for a social media posting. Caption was ‘Rolled out of bed like this’, when actually she did not roll of bed like that. She had to adjust the background and the prop, just like how a photo shoot would go on. She is crafting a story for the posting. That is fiction. The reality?

I won’t take you far for analogy. Look at your old candid photos or photos of you taken by other people without you having to consciously prep for the photo. One look sincere and genuine, and the other one, staged. Not all are blind and some get a little bit confused on what exactly do you want to tell from your photos.

“A picture is worth a thousand words”: they say.

We may paint our feed wall with anything we want because its ours. But the fact you are sharing it, the message which will come across will not be one way. ‘Hey, look at me,what I have, who I am with, and whatever price tag which you want to ‘share’ cz it makes you feel good. It shows which SES you are from if that is how you want to be associated with. But a true friend who really cares for you need not to see all this. If you are really sharing for family members and friends then these questions won’t be applicable to you as you do not have to be posting to just be proving.

Anything for that matter.

Where do you put your self worth with family members and close friends ? You trust that they do not judge and know you enough that whatever you may be posting won’t change their impressions and thoughts of you. Your respect, warmth and trust is enough.Nuff said.

You carry on the reality check from here.

On to the other side of the fence..Impression management we may say. But for what? Will these followers, Likes etc land you a good and happy life? How much time are we spending to leave impression when the moment we put down the phone we fail to connect back to reality and acknowledge our real priorities. And not forgetting the real people and relations around us?

Forgetting our responsibilities and delaying appointments because we overlooked the time scrolling and scrolling. Our life is disrupted in a way we want to believe as subtle way when in fact the impact is actually bigger. You be the judge for this one.

Note: You may expand the scope beyond IG if you don’t have IG. Any social media platform for that matter!

Let’s be real people. I certainly don’t know what the current generation is really up to nowadays with constant flood of selfies. Not all of course. I’ve seen postings of selfies everyday! Well at least be creative for goodness sake.

My real concern is that we, young or old, are spending precious times of our lives on things which will most definitely NOT change our lives for the better or make anyone else’s for that matter. If you are a celebrity and have a ‘brand’ or popularity to maintain AND an assistant to take care of your postings, just be sure its for the larger and wider good [plus this note will not really be applicable to that social media account].

Iam certainly not against any platforms generated for the wider good and a positive CHANGE or CAUSE. Business? Well, I am not talking about business owned social media accounts here. Talking about those owned and managed by our

own-selves.

Bututlike I said if the message from your posting is for the better good, then proceed as long as your own life is managed and prioritised well.

Some of us are daughters, wives, mothers, sons, husbands, fathers, leaders . Refresh back , what is our role in our lives . Primarily. What are our goals in life? Are we on track per plan? What is stopping us? Oh, we actually have it all already. But what can you do better? Who’s life can you help change positively? Have you mended all our relationships ? Are there anything else which you actually want or need to learn? Dude, what are you on earth for? Just goes back to the basic. Time IS precious and wasting time is not wise at every level.

If your traditional or religious values aren’t enough to tell you how to prioritise in life and respect relationships with real people, it won’t take long for science to show you what have emerged over the years being hooked to gadgets, social media etc and what it can eventually do to you.

Studies have shown this can bring out and up the NARCISSISM in you. What we know is that, along the narc spectrum until it reaches NPD ,a clinical disorder and the highest level of narcissism, there is nothing good about it as it will make your self-esteem go low eventhough you think you are fine.

Foryou who are addicted to ‘acknowledgments’ and ‘positive feedbacks’, slightest cut from your ‘supply’ (your gadgets or the Likes/Follow), will make you anxious. You get agitated quickly. If you have it totally removed, you get withdrawal symptoms and may find it difficult to figure out why on earth do you exist? What’s more important than get appraisals and nods from your followers! You epic-ly fail to find your purpose. Just like a substance or drug addict. You go on and on until your self-destructive mode calls for intervention !

In this country, soon there will be a pressing need for psychiatry and psychology units in hospitals to look at cases of depression due to burnouts, AND personality issues. One of these personality issues is actually NARCISSISM. Go read it first and come back if you do not know what it is.

NARCISSISM is a poison in all of us. Suppress it with knowledge and wisdom. Activate it ? Well, with what we are currently doing mostly right now.. self-satisfying routines such as posting a goooooood photo of ourselves with the hopes of the Likes and Followers! More Likes and followers you will get, the more elevated you become (falsely). The more elevated you become, the higher at risk you are in responding to any direct or negative respond constructively. You become more sensitive and vulnerable with ANY dislikes or unfollow. You get upset.

Sound familiar? You can relate it to the children of this generation who some get upset just because of an unfriend, unfollow, or an unlike. Or you can relate it to you good ole self. No harm there as we’re all trying to improve our own lives. I have seen local celebrities who literally FLIP due unlikes/dislike in YouTube videos..I just find it absurd but that is the current reality.

So again, I call ALL of us to find a quiet time with ourselves (just you, and you alone..) and truly reflect this: Is it all worth it?

Let not the current and younger generation go through this mess once you have gotten the message from this piece of writing. Act today, and make an effort to improve the quality of our lives!

Here are 5 tips you can try in order to reduce phone and social media addiction:-

1. List of your top 3 goals you like to achieve

2. List of top 3 habits you like to break so that you goal achieving becomes easier

3. For each goals you have targeted, list all the steps you need to do. Done?

4. Those steps which will require follow up and actions, translate them as items in your organiser. Ie what do you need to do when.

5. Tick off those items once they have been done/achieved. Don’t look back!

6. Put your phone away or on silent EVERYTIME you engage with your family and friends. Respect them. And EVERYTIME you come home BUILD a habit to go through you evening chores, dinner etc first before looking at your phones. Anything after 5pm in general is your own time. No bosses should be breathing down your neck. For matters related with life and deaths, the phone call is available.

Yours in writing,

missJeweLz